Famous Funny Quotes

Famous Funny Quotes Biography
A million thanks to Steve for sharing some of his fantastic collection with me!

History is a cyclic poem written by Time upon the memories of man.  ~Percy Bysshe Shelley

If you want to understand today, you have to search yesterday.  ~Pearl Buck

History is philosophy teaching by examples.  ~Thucydides, The History of the Peloponnesian War

People are trapped in history, and history is trapped in them.  ~James Baldwin, Notes of a Native Son

The great eventful Present hides the Past; but through the din
Of its loud life hints and echoes from the life behind steal in.
~John Greenleaf Whittier

Until lions have their historians, tales of the hunt shall always glorify the hunters.  ~African Proverb

The memories of men are too frail a thread to hang history from.  ~John Still, The Jungle Tide

All the ancient histories, as one of our wits say, are just fables that have been agreed upon.  ~Voltaire, Jeannot et Colin

Professor Johnston often said that if you didn't know history, you didn't know anything.  You were a leaf that didn't know it was part of a tree.  ~Michael Crichton, Timeline

We used to root for the Indians against the cavalry, because we didn't think it was fair in the history books that when the cavalry won it was a great victory, and when the Indians won it was a massacre.  ~Dick Gregory

History is herstory, too.  ~Author Unknown

A history in which every particular incident may be true may on the whole be false.  ~Thomas Babington Macaulay

History with its flickering lamp stumbles along the trail of the past, trying to reconstruct its scenes, to revive its echoes, and kindle with pale gleams the passion of former days.  ~Winston Churchill

History is a mighty dramos, enacted upon the theatre of times, with suns for lamps and eternity for a background.  ~Thomas Carlyle

History is a novel for which the people is the author.  ~Alfred de Vigny, Réflexions sur la Vérité dans l'Art

History is a kind of introduction to more interesting people than we can possibly meet in our restricted lives; let us not neglect the opportunity.  ~Dexter Perkins

History was a trash bag of random coincidences torn open in a wind.  Surely, Watt with his steam engine, Faraday with his electric motor, and Edison with his incandescent light bulb did not have it as their goal to contribute to a fuel shortage some day that would place their countries at the mercy of Arab oil.  ~Joseph Heller, Good as Gold

Very few things happen at the right time, and the rest do not happen at all:  the conscientious historian will correct these defects.  ~Herodotus, The History of Herodotus

History:  gossip well told.  ~Elbert Hubbard, The Roycroft Dictionary

History is a symphony of echoes heard and unheard.  It is a poem with events as verses.  ~Charles Angoff

If one could make alive again for other people some cobwebbed skein of old dead intrigues and breathe breath and character into dead names and stiff portraits.  That is history to me!  ~George Macaulay Trevelyan

The history of the world is the record of a man in quest of his daily bread and butter.  ~Hendrik Wilhelm van Loon, The Story of Mankind

Historians are gossips who tease the dead.  ~Voltaire, Scribbling Books

History is filled with the sound of silken slippers going downstairs and wooden shoes coming up.  ~Voltaire

We are the prisoners of history.  Or are we?  ~Robert Penn Warren, Segregation

History never looks like history when you are living through it.  ~John W. Gardner

Legend:  A lie that has attained the dignity of age.  ~H.L. Mencken

God cannot alter the past, though historians can.  ~Samuel Butler, "Prose Observations"

I know the answer! The answer lies within the heart of all mankind! The answer is twelve? I think I'm in the wrong building.
-- Charles Shulz

Convent. A place of retirement for women who wish for leisure to meditate upon the sin of idleness.
-- Ambrose Bierce

I adore political parties. They are the only place left to us where people don't talk politics.
-- Oscar Wilde

Plagiarists at least have the quality of preservation.
-- Benjamin Disraeli

I believe in equality for everyone, except reporters and photographers.
-- Mahatma Gandhi

Why do grandparents and grandchildren get along so well? They have the same enemy -- the mother.
-- Claudette Colbert

If you think nobody cares if you're alive, try missing a couple of car payments.
-- Flip Wilson
Famous Funny Quotes
Famous Funny Quotes
Famous Funny Quotes
Famous Funny Quotes
Famous Funny Quotes
Famous Funny Quotes
Famous Funny Quotes
Famous Funny Quotes
Famous Funny Quotes
Famous Funny Quotes
Famous Funny Quotes
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